Saturday, October 29, 2005

useless me, brainless me

I’m not pleased at all. Why my dad always asks me when my examination is? How is my preparation? I don’t like he asks me about all these. I hate him when he compares my results with his friend’s daughter. Sigh. He does that always. Hate!!!

To tell you the truth, I prepared nothing. Trial is in the mid of November. I have nothing about books in my mind. Not at all. No bio’s facts, no chem’s info. Not a single stuff except TV programmes, my meals and sleeping in my brain.

I know. People do a lot better than I am. I have put in my best efforts to do the very best I can. However, it came out a very disappointed result. *the result is ok but no universities want me* I am really fed up after I got my results in august. Now that I have to re do all over again (on parents’ wish). I have no time, no hope and no strength. All the while (these few months), I just sit at the sofa with the TV remote control and watch TV from morning till night. My friend always asks me to study but I can’t put the strength together. I forgot what I’ve learnt last time.

I know I’m cheating on myself. (And my friends). I told them I’d studied. Indeed, I have done nothing at all. I felt sorry to everyone especially my parents. They raise me up, give me a good condition to study and to live, show me the direction of what to do in the future, provide me all the best with their efforts. They just want me to score well in the exam to enter a better university, but I can’t follow as they said. They’re my entire fault. My fault.

I know I am going to disappointed them once again. I don’t think I can do better than the previous. With my very best efforts also, I tend to forget what I’ve studied lately. Today while having tea with friend, I could not answer her questions she set on spot. How brainless I am!

I really don’t know how to face the exam. Hopeless…

*lots grammar mistake, sorry*

Wednesday, October 12, 2005

I hate exams!

I’ve quit from my job. My last day was 30th September. Everything was normal on that day. There was nothing much special as I still have to do from copying to photocopying.

I’ve resigned from the job make me even lazier than usual. Since stating of October, I am staying at home. Do the normal 3 things, eat sleep and watching television. Actually I should have start revising and studying as my trial exam is coming soon. 4 months passed. I’ve forgot what I’ve learnt. I’ve forgot what the teachers have thought. How am I going to sit for the exam? Now I’ve just less than a month time. Less than 30 days. I’ve to finish all the 5 books of my biology and chemistry. Do you think I’ve enough time for everything? Besides, I’ve to take practical examination. Worse is that, I’ve forgot the way to do experiments, those chemical reagents and effects and planning. Oh my! I am very sure that I can’t finish. I can’t focus at all. So many books are waiting for me. Genetic stuff in bio is my weakest part. Start studying it really takes my life. I hate it so much! There are so many things I don’t understand. These and those. All I can say is, I hate genetics!!!

listening to ayumi hamasaki's heaven now. this is a nice song.

Monday, October 03, 2005


How chocolate evolved.

Chocolate, as we know it today, first appeared in the form of “bitter water” known as xocoatl during the Mayan civilization as early as the sixth century. The word “chocolate” is derived from this very Mayan word. Cocoa trees are said to have originated in the Amazon some 4000 years ago and the Mayans were the first to cultivate them. The Aztecs, however, believed cocoa plants were brought down from heaven by their god Quetzalcoatl in 1200 A. D.

In the Mayan and Aztec cultures, cocoa was the basic for xocoatl- a thick, unsweetened drink believed to be a health elixir. Spices such as hot chilli pepper and corn meal were used to add flavour to the drink, as sugar was unknown to the Mayans and Aztecs. Aztec emperor, Montezuma, used to drink 50 goblets of thick chocolate everyday for its nourishing and aphrodisiac qualities.

In 1528, Hernando de Oviedo y Valdez inspired the making of chocolate in its current sweet form when he presented Spanish King Charles V with cocoa beans and the necessary tools for its preparation. The Spaniards mixed the beans with sugar, vanilla, nutmeg, cloves, allspice and cinnamon to create tantalizing, fashionable chocolates. These chocolates were reserved for the nobility only.

It was in 1643 that chocolate took on a new role; Spanish Princess Maria Theresa gave her fiancé, Louis XIV of France an engagement gift of chocolate. Ever since, chocolate was the preferred girt for it was a luxury as well as an aphrodisiac.

this article taken from a booklet. however, i forgot where i 've taken from.
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